"Copy watch? Copy watch, sir?"

Doris and I recently visited Hong Kong for the first time, in connection with one of my business trips. Doris actually saw the city in much more depth than I did, because she had time to tour while I spoke at a lawyers' conference. So, Doris took most of the pictures I'm posting to this blog.

I came to Hong Kong expecting to see swarthy Chinese men skulking around the waterfront and shadowy underworld figures smuggling heroin ashore from junks anchored in the harbor. (Okay, so maybe I've read too many thrillers set in Hong Kong.) The reality was quite different. Hong Kong is a very clean, efficient, generic, business-oriented city, with an incredible number of skyscrapers crammed into very limited space. We found it to be quite expensive compared to Bangkok, but then almost every other city is. We didn't have the best weather, which made getting good views problematic, since fog hung over the city and harbor during most of our visit.

Some examples of the interesting buildings comprising the impressive skyline:



























The vast majority of food available outside the
western-style hotels was...well, genuine Chinese.

The Chinese do love their signs!

This was a sign on the side of a bus, which for some reason struck me as funny. Maybe it was because the last character expressed how I felt.

We answered some questions for these Hong Kong schoolchildren, who were conducting a tourist survey as part of a school assignment. They then agreed to have their picture taken with Doris.

Here I am next to the hotel at which my lawyers' conference was held.

These three stony-faced Chinamen we encountered along the way vowed not to report to the police the incident described below.

My own most memorable experience occurred when I bought a Rolex watch. Well, not exactly. I had heard that tourists could buy cheap knockoffs of premium-brand watches, so I was hoping to find one. I needn't have worried. You have to take only a few steps into the city before being assaulted by numerous vendors stepping into your path and saying, "Copy watch, sir? How about a copy watch?" It's either that or someone offering to make you a tailored suit in a matter of hours. When my legal conference was over, I finally took up one of the offers to sell me a counterfeit watch. I didn't have the slightest twinge of conscience in making this purchase, because I'd never, ever pay $11,000 for a Rolex watch, and so my purchase of a counterfeit version certainly wasn't going to take a sale away from the genuine Rolex company.

Anyway, the street vendor to whom I said, "Yes, I would like a copy watch" eagerly delivered us into the hands of a colleague, who in turn led us through a maze of underground passages. Just about the time I was starting to wonder whether we were being enticed into a remote location so we could be mugged in privacy, we came upon a small shop. It had baby clothes taped to the display window, in a feeble effort to create the impression of a legitimate business. In the shop itself, there was nothing but an empty display counter and two chairs. The seller pulled a binder out from under the counter, and I flipped through pictures of genuine Rolex watches until I found one I liked. Another associate then went off to retrieve the fake Rolex from their stash. When he got back, I inspected the watch, noting that Rolex actually was spelled R-o-l-e-x, and not R-o-l-e-c-k-s, for example. We then began haggling over the price. The seller started at $120, which I immediately rejected. Doris and I had to threaten to leave several times, and actually leave once, before the price finally came down to the $40 I was willing to pay.

We flew back to Bangkok the next day, and I awoke that morning wondering whether my new watch still would be running. I was pleased to see it hadn't yet died, as I feared it might have. On the plane back to Thailand, though, I tried to adjust the time, only to discover I couldn't pry the watch stem away from the case to enable me to move the hands. At first Doris thought this might be because my fingernails weren't long enough, but she tried and failed herself. When we got back to Bangkok, I got out my tool box and used various screwdrivers and pliers in vain attempts to budge the stem. No luck. Finally Doris suggested that I take the watch to a nearby watch repair shop.

I went to the shop and did my best to explain to the Thai staff, using the usual pantomime routines, the problem I was having. Despite the language barrier, the sales girl understood my predicament and took the watch into the rear of the shop. Minutes later a watchmaker emerged and demonstrated that, in order to set the time on a Rolex (whether genuine or not), one must patiently unscrew, rather than pry, the watch stem away from the case. So, there you have it. It turns out that even counterfeit Rolex models have features designed to keep unsophisticated rubes like me from operating them!